Dealing With a Full Deck
by Jet Set Radio Yoyo
Summary: Spades, Hearts, Clubs, and Diamonds. Each Kingdom is very different from each other and yet they all need a King, Queen, and Jack to function. Spades needs a queen and unfortunately no one ever told England that he is to become the new queen. USUK, yaoi
1. Chapter 1

**Dealing With a Full Deck**

**Chapter 1**

**Disclaimer: I do now own Hetalia.**

**Summary: Spades, Hearts, Clubs, and Diamonds. Each Kingdom is very different from each other and yet they all need a King, Queen, and Jack to function. Spades needs a queen and unfortunately no one ever told England that he is to become the new queen.**

**Couples: England X Alfred, Ludwig X Feliciano, Roderich X Elizaveta, and possible other couples.**

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><p>"So the Queen of Spades is dead, huh?"<p>

That was the first thing that came out of Gilbert's mouth when he heard the news of the poor queen's death. The white haired man's demonic tail flicked from side to side and the smirk that he usually wore on his face was gone. The red eyed man just looked down at his apprentice, the person who had told him the news, and waited for the boy to respond. The boy, a child by the name of Peter, only looked up at his teacher with wide blue eyes.

"She died last night in her sleep; I heard that she went peacefully." Peter said.

Gilbert just let out a small groan before he ran a hand through his hair.

"Aw man couldn't she have lived a bit longer." Gilbert said.

Peter just gave his teacher a blank look before he said "Gilbert she was 110 years old."

"I know she could have lived for another 110 years."

Peter really didn't know what to say to that so instead he just asked "Why do you care so much if the Queen of Spades is dead or not? It does not affect us in any way."

Gilbert just looked at his small protégé before he sighed and asked "Ok kid let me ask you this, what is that we Jokers do?"

"Pull pranks?" Peter answered, but it sounded more like a question.

"Besides pull pranks." Gilbert said.

Peter was quite for a long time before he said "Pull more pranks?"

Gilbert sighed before finally decided to have mercy on the kid and answer the question.

"We Jokers get to live a pretty nice life. We get to screw around with people and we don't have to worry about things that affect regular people. We live way longer than your average human and we have some pretty awesome powers."

"Yeah, so what does that have to do with anything?" Peter asked he really didn't know where this conversation was going.

"Everything comes with a price kid that includes our way of life. Our payment for being able to live such an awesome life is that we have to make sure that the four kingdoms stay standing. Making sure that each kingdom has their King, Queen, and Jack is just one of our jobs." Gilbert said.

"But don't the Kingdoms usually find them on their own. The Spade Kingdom was able to find their King and Jack just fine last month." Peter said.

"That's true the Spade Kingdom has three clocks that will lead them straight to their King, Queen, and Jack. The Queen, King, and Jack also have the mark of the spade on them to prove who they are." Gilbert said.

The white haired man gave his young Joker friend a large grin before he snapped his fingers and held his hand out toward the blue eyed boy. Within a matter of seconds a small ball of light appeared in the albino's hand and after shinning for a few minutes the light finally disappeared only to reveal that Gilbert was now holding a large gold pocket watch. The minute hand and the hour hand of the watch were moving round the clock's face at in unnatural speed. Peter just watched as the hands of the clock raced around and he was only snapped out of his staring when he heard Gilbert start speaking.

"Usually the Kingdom can find their royal family on their own, but sometimes they don't find them as fast as we would like. Other times it's impossible for them to find them and for good reason."

"Impossible?" Peter asked, his eyes never moving away from the clock.

"Sometimes the new Queen, King, or Jack is another world. Since our Queen finding clock here is freaking out then that means our little Queen is not from this world." Gilbert said.

"Then how is the Spade Kingdom supposed to get their Queen?" Peter asked.

Gilbert just laughed and gave the young Joker a smile.

"The answer to that question is simple; if the Spade Kingdom can't find their Queen then we do it for them…."

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><p>England had always had sort of sixth sense ever since he was young. He seemed to always be able to tell when something was going to happen be it something good, bad, or just plain strange. England didn't know if it was because he was a nation, he had to have it considering the fact that most of his friends were mischievous mythical creatures, or if it was just a combination of things but he had it and that was all that mattered. England would always just get this feeling that something was off and when he got that feeling something would usually happen. Whenever England got that feeling he would usually be just a little bit on edge which would explain why he was a little jumpy today.<p>

He had woken up with this feeling that something was wrong, but he couldn't find a thing out of place. There was nothing of great concern on the news (or at least nothing that was new anyway), he had no meeting planned for the day, and so far no other nation had called him saying that something bad had happened. Yet he just could not get of the feeling that something bad would happen soon. So with nothing else left to do he went and made a cup of tea to try and calm him down. The tea was helping to calm him down at first, but just when he was starting to relax the bad things started happening.

_Tick, tick, tick, tick…_

"What in the world is that noise?" England grumbled to himself as he got up from his seat at the kitchen table.

It sounded like the ticking of a clock, but the ticking was rather loud. England immediately went off in search of the noise so that he could stop the never ending ticking. England left his kitchen and made his way down the fall. As he got closer the loud ticking noise it got louder and louder until he finally made it to his office door. The ticking noise seemed to be coming from behind the door and after letting out a small sigh England opened the door and looked around his office.

England looked around the room to see what could possibly be making the noise, but the room looked pretty normal. His computer was turned off, every book was in its place on the bookshelves, and the only clock in the room was a small desk clock that was not able to even make any ticking noise at such a loud volume. England walked into the room and looked around only to have his eyes widen when he looked over at the full body mirror that he had in the room. Staring back at him was not his reflection, but what looked like Prussia. However this Prussia in the mirror did not look like the Prussia that that England was used to.

He had (what looked like) small red horns on his head and England could see that he had a demon tail and said tail was slowly moving around. His red eyed where blank of any emotion and he had a small frown on his face. The Prussia lookalike in the mirror had what looked like a pocket watch in his hands, but the white haired male was holding it so that Arthur could not see the face of the clock.

Just what in the world was this? It could not be magic because Prussia didn't believe in magic much less know how to use it. It could have been an elaborate prank, but if that was the case then this was the strangest prank that the blond nation had ever seen. Well whatever it was it was the ticking seemed to be coming from the mirror, or to be more specific it was coming from the clock in the red eyed man's hand. England slowly made his way over to the mirror until he was standing right in front of the mirror.

The white haired male lowered his hand slightly so that England could now see the face of the clock. The hands of the clock where moving about at a crazy speed, but suddenly once the two hands of the clock were both pointing at England they froze in place and the loud ticking fell silent. The man in the mirror suddenly gave England a large happy grin and let out a small chuckle. England blinked and opened his mouth, but before England could even say a word the man reached out with his free hand and grabbed wrist. England was quickly pulled into the mirror and before England could even processes what was going on he felt something hit his head. England's world started to turn black, but before he passed out he heard the white haired man speak.

"I have finally found you Queen of Spade…."

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><p><strong>Ok, so that's chapter one. Info time!<strong>

**Cardtalia: Yeah so I decided to jump onto the Cardtalia bandwagon. After seeing so many Cardtalia fanfics I decided I wanted to try my hand at writing one as well.**

**Jokers: I don't really know how Jokers work so I just kind of came up with an idea of how they function. In this fanfic you can think of them as spirits of some type. They will be covered more in depth as the fanfic goes on, but I can at least talk about the basics. As Gilbert said here they live for a very long time and they have some interesting powers and abilities. In exchange for living the sweet life they have to keep the Cardtalia world in check and make sure that the Kingdoms don't get completely taken off the map. Other than that though they are free to do what they please. Again I'll talk about them and the fanfic itself will explain them more as we go on.**

**England: So in most Cardtalia fanfics that I have seen the person who becomes the new Queen/King/Jack is usually a human from another world or they are from the Cardtalia world itself. As I read them I kept thinking 'what would happen if a nation was chosen'. With that thought this fanfic was soon born. **

**Anyway, I will try and get the next chapter out as soon as possible so please review and don't flame. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Dealing With a Full Deck**

**Chapter 2**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia.**

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><p>'<em>What happened?<em>'

That was the only thing that going though England's head as he slowly came back into the waking world. He could hear birds singing around him and he could hear the leaves rustle slightly in the wind. England slowly opened his eyes only to be met with the sight of the blue sky filled with white fluffy clouds. England slowly sat only to see that he was sitting in a small clearing in the middle of some forest.

'_A forest? How in the world did I get out here.' _England thought_._

England's mind was a complete blank, but after thinking about it for a few seconds England immediately started to remember what had last happened in his office.

'_That's right Prussia pulled me into the mirror and that's the last thing that I can remember, but how in the world did I end up in a forest and what was that thing about the Queen of Spade?' _England thought.

The blond nation just shook his head and sighed before he mumbled "Thinking about all this is making my head hurt."

The whole incident with the mirror was probably just a prank that his pixie friends had pulled on him. The pixies were rather mischievous and the last time he talked to any of them they were complaining that all he did was stay inside and work all day. They had been babbling about how they would get the Englishmen outside so he could enjoy some fresh air, but England didn't think they would do it like this. This was a pretty messed up way to get him outside, but then again the pixies always had a messed up sense of humor. England did slightly wonder what the Queen of Spade thing was all about and the devil like Prussia was pretty strange, but right now he had to focus on getting back home he could think about those things latter.

England searched the pockets before he finally pulled out his iphone (a bleated birthday gift from America) and started to call 999. It was a bit embarrassing to be calling an emergency number to have someone help him out of a forest, but the idea of wandering around in the woods and getting even more lost was not very appealing so he was willing to live through the embarrassment. However when he tried to call the number the phone just immediately told him that he had no service. England sighed a little before he placed his phone back into his pocket. It looked like he was going to have to just get out of the forest himself.

England was about to stand up so he could finally try and get out of the woods, but suddenly he heard some rustling sounds coming from the bushes. England looked toward the bushes expecting to see a deer or something like that come out, only to see a little white blob come out instead. The white blob was eating the leaves off the bush, but upon seeing England it stopped eating and looked right at him. The blob had bright blue eyes, a little mouth, and black markings under its eyes that made it look like it was wearing glasses. It looked like a mochi from Japan's plush mochi collection and it also kind of reminded him of America.

"Oh, I must be dreaming." England said as he closed his eyes and flopped back down onto the grass.

Ok, maybe this was not a trick caused by pixies but just a dream that must be heavily influenced by alcohol.

"I just need to wake up and it will all be over. So come on wake up already." England said to himself as he covered his eyes with his hand.

The mochi just watched England as he chanted 'wake up' to himself for a few minutes before it finally just hoped over to England and nipped his hand.

"Ouch!" England yelled out before he quickly sat up and grabbed the blue eyed blob.

"That hurt you little bugger!" England yelled out to the thing.

The white blob just smiled at him before it yelled out "Hero!"

England just glared at the squeaky voiced blob for a few seconds before he just shook his head. England let out a loud sigh and dropped the mochi before he said "Out of everything in the world that I could dream about why did I dream this?"

England just sat there and wallowed in his misery for a few seconds before he finally stood up and sighed.

"I can try and figure this all out latter right now I need to get out of this forest." England said to himself.

England took one step and then suddenly felt something run into him. England looked down only to see the little white mochi look back up at him.

"Do you want to come with me?" England asked.

The mochi just made a little motion that looked like it was nodding and yelled out in its squeaky voice "Hero!"

England sighed before he picked up the little mochi and looked it right in its eyes.

"Fine you can come with me, but if you bite me again I'm tossing you into a tree." England said.

The mochi just nodded (or at least England thought it was nodding) before it jumped onto England's left shoulder and made itself comfortable. England just sighed before he walked out of the clearing and into the forest. Arthur must have spent about an hour wondering around the forest and the whole time he was wondering around his mochi companion just hummed what sounded like the star spangled banner. Eventually England made it out of the forest and out into the open. There was a large field that seemed to go on forever and there was a simple dirt path near the outskirts of the forest.

From a distance England could see that there was a fork in the road and England could just make out a signpost. England quickly ran down the dirt path and straight toward the signpost. Once he was at the sign post England started to read it. The arrow that pointed toward the right path said 'Bluebell Village' while the arrow that pointed to the left said 'Dunnan, capital of Spade'.

'_Spade? Didn't the Prussia in the mirror say something about a Spade Queen or something?' _England thought.

He definitely remembered hearing something about Spade. Well this Dunnan place was the capital of Spade if the sign was right so the queen and king of this place (whatever this place was) should be there. If that's the case then maybe something would happen there to finally wake him up. Honestly it was a bit of a long shot, but England really didn't have much else to go on.

"It looks like we are going to Dunnan." England said as he walked down the path that would lead him to the capital.

"Hero?" The little mochi called out in response. England said nothing to this he just walked down that lonely road that would eventually get him to the capital….

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><p>"I thought you were going to drop him off right at the castle."<p>

Peter and Gilbert where sitting in a tree watching England as he walked down the road. Peter was glaring at his teacher and Gilbert just scratched the back of his head in slight embarrassment.

"Hey spells that are used to transport anyone other than myself have never been my specialty." Gilbert said.

The white haired man then gave his friend a smile before he said "It's not like it's that big of a deal he's going straight to the capital anyway and the guards have been checking every single person who goes through the city's gates for the spade mark. Their find his mark, take him to the castle, and then the Queen's clock can confirm that he is indeed the queen. We just have to make sure that he makes it to the city safe and sound."

Peter just frowned a little, but he sighed and asked "You are sure that everything will be alright?"

"I'm positive and besides the guy has two awesome Jokers watching over him." Gilbert said.

"I guess you're right." Peter said.

"I know I'm right now come on we don't want to lose sight of him." Gilbert said and without another word the two Jokers quietly followed the blond nation…

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><p>England had been walking on that dirt path for what felt like hours, but he finally made it to his distention. England could not see much of the city itself thanks to the high walls that surrounded the city, but the walls seemed to go on forever and even from outside the walls England could hear the all of the noise that was going on in the city. A steady stream of people, horses, and wagons full of supplies where going in and out of the city gates and England could see guards dressed up in armor of all things talking to each and every person who were going into (and out of) the city. For some reason the people that the guards talked to would always pull their shirts down a little so that the guards could see a bit of their chests.<p>

"What the hell are they doing?" England said as if his round blob of a companion could answer the question.

The blue eyed creature just gave him a blank look as it hummed some nameless tune. England sighed and silently questions why he even bothered asking before he quietly slipped into a huge crowd of people that were going into the city. When the crowd stopped at the gate to talk to the guards England kept walking. He hoped that the guards would not notice him slipping into the city, but much to England's great displeasure the guards noticed him within a matter of seconds.

"Sir, stop right their!" One of the guards shouted at England. England was about to take of running, but before he could even start to run he felt a hand clamp down on his shoulder. England turned and looked at his captor only to see a young male standing there with a slight smile on his face.

"Sir, if you'll come with me back to the gate we can get you checked in. I promise you that this won't take long." The guard said.

England grumbled a little under his breath, but he allowed the man to lead him back to the gate and over to a small wooden table that was set up next to the gate. Ten different stacks of paper were set up in a neat little row across the table. An old man with grey was sitting behind the table and he gave Arthur a small smile.

"Don't worry this won't take long. We just need to get you checked in so that we can avoid having to constantly check you when you come in and out of the city." The elderly man said.

England just sighed and the man only chuckled slightly before he looked down at the paper in front of him.

"What's your name?" The man asked.

"England." England said without missing a beat. This was a dream after all so it's not like it mattered too much on what he said.

"England, huh? Interesting name it sounds like it should be a name for a nation then a young man though." The man commented as he wrote England's name down.

'_Oh if only you knew…'_ England thought.

"Got a last name?" The man asked.

"Kirkland." Arthur said with a shrug of his shoulders.

It was his human last name so it would work here.

"Age?" The man asked.

England struggled a bit with this question for a few minutes. Honestly, he was unsure if he should say his real age or not. Eventually England just randomly chose a number from the top of his head and said with slight nervousness "Twenty-one?"

The man didn't say a word he just wrote the age down.

"Alright, what town are you from?" The man asked.

"What town am I from?" Arthur repeated.

"As in what town do you live in right now?" The man said "Unless you're a traveler and if that's the case just tell me what town you were born in."

Arthur remembered the name of the other town that he saw on the signpost a while back and decided to use that as his 'home town'.

"Bluebell Village." Arthur said.

The old man smiled a little before he said "I know that town, it's a nice little farming village."

He wrote the name of the town down before he looked up at England and smiled.

"All right, all we need to do is check you for the mark and then we are done." The elderly man said.

"Mark?" England said in a confused tone.

He didn't get an answer to this, but he did have the guard who escorted him over to the table pull his shirt down a little. England immediately slapped the man's hand away and yelled out "What the bloody hell do you think you're doing!"

"Checking you for the spade mark?" The guard said nervously.

England was about to yell at the man some more, but before he could even begin yelling he heard someone from behind him say "Oh for the love of Spade…"

England could feel someone grab him and lift him up a little.

"Just check him for the mark already." England's captor said.

The guard just nodded his head before he went back to checking for this mark of theirs. Needless to say, England was less than thrilled about the whole predicament and he showed his great displeasure to everyone in the area by kicking his legs and cursing up a storm. As England struggled his mochi friend just grabbed a hold of his sweater vest with its mouth and held on for its dear life. A small group of people had taken to watching the whole scene play out, and most of the crowed found it to be rather amusing. The poor guard who was tasked with checking England for the mark had to quickly avoid being kicked, but he was finally able to pull England's shirt down just enough so that he could see if he had the mark.

The second that the guard got a good look at his chest his eyes widened a bit in disbelief.

"Well, does he have the mark?" The guard that was holding England asked.

The guard just looked up and whispered "He has the mark…"

"What was that?" The other guard asked as he continued to struggle with England.

"He has the mark!" The guard shouted out.

The area around them fell silent and England just looked down at his chest only to see something that he had never seen before. Right there on the left side of his chest was a blue spade mark that was about as big as your average playing card. That was most definitely not there before, but England just figured it was a part of this very crazy dream of his and left it that. The silence felt like it would go on forever, but after a few minutes had passed the crowed that had gathered around broke out into a loud mummer. England's mochi friend made its way back onto England's shoulder which was very easy to do now since England had stopped struggling.

The man who had been holding England gently placed him back down on the ground and England quickly slapped away the hand of the guard that was still holding his shirt down. The guard just took a couple steps away from him before he gave England a nervous smile. England only glared at the man in response, but he quickly stopped glaring when a small group of guards surrounded him.

"Sir, I have to ask you to please come with us to the castle." The guard said "I promise you any questions that you have will be answered there."

England just sighed before he said "Alright…."

He was going to wherever this Queen of Spade character was and it was probably a safe bet that she would be at the castle so he guessed that this worked out for him. The guard smiled at England and a motion to his companions to start walking. The guards had formed a small circle around England and it looked England was going to be staying in the middle of this group during this whole trip to the castle. Honestly, at this point in time England didn't care anymore and he could only hope that he would wake up soon….

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><p><strong>Info time!<strong>

**The 999 number?: The 999 number is the British emergency number. I have also read that the number 112 is also used, but for the fanfic I just stuck with 999. **

**The Iphone?: England has an Iphone mostly because that's the only phone that I'm (mostly) familiar with. However, England only uses it as a music player and as a phone so he does not have much on it.**

**England's name: I have it in my head that the nations only use their human names when around people who don't know who they are and they use their nation name when around other nations or people who know they are nations. So long story short, human names are not all that important to them. I'll probably just stick to using England's actual name in this fanfic. **

**Town Names: I could not come up with a good town name at all. I came up with a couple ideas on what to name the towns, but each idea for a town name that I came up with I ended up not doing because I didn't think they worked for one reason or another. After struggling with coming up with good town names for awhile I eventually decided to name the towns after the various towns/villages/cities that are in video games. So each town name that you will see in this fanfic will be a reference to a town located in a game. If I ever mention a town I'll say what it's named after in the 'Info Time' that I have at the end of each chapter. So now why don't I explain the two towns.**

**Bluebell village- I named it after the town in the game 'Harvest Moon: A Tale of Two Towns'. The town is a European-style town that focuses mostly on animals.**

**Dunnan- I decided to name the capital of Spades after a town in the PS2 game 'Culdcept'. In the game, the town of Dunnan is also called the 'Land of Destiny'. It's also the very first town in the game. **

**Anyway, I'll try and get chapter 3 out as soon as I can so please review and don't flame. **


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